Women's Rights and Feminism...

Throughout this crazy election season and particularly in the last few weeks, I have had several female friends ask me "What side are you on?" in regard to "Women's Rights" and "Feminism".

My first thought is "Why are things always divided into 'sides'?"

My response is to ask them to please define the "sides" so I can give them an informed response.

Having been asked this question so much, I figured I would write my thoughts out here. 

Let me start by saying that I completely agree with the sentiment of a friend of mine. Men and women are uniquely different and that isn't a bad thing. 

It is a good thing. 

It is part of what gives each one of us our own set of unique skills and abilities, talents and perspectives, so that we can make a contribution to the world and the lives of others. 

Second, I want to say that "differences" doesn't make one more or less valuable than anyone else, it makes each and every one valuable because they cannot be replaced.

Generally, when I ask for clarification, it comes down to two deeply polarized choices: Are you "For Women" or "For Their Abuse & Oppression".

Personally, I find those options to be a tad ridiculous. 

I mean, really? 

Can't we be "For Humanity" and the dignity, respect and value of each and EVERY life? Why do we have to value one over the other and why is it bad to value the lives of men as well?

Having a husband, two sons, two brothers, a father, and a plethora of male friends and family, I have to say that to me, their lives and rights matter just as much as mine, just as much as my daughter's, mother's, sister's and female friend's and family's.

A friend of mine made a post about the differences between men and women and how we cannot, in all things, be "equal". It was a bold statement, that I happen to agree with, and she was courageous to step out and share her feelings on the matter. It is a risky position to take, and the responses she got did nothing to encourage others to share similar perspectives. 

Which, of course, is why I felt like sharing mine. She inspired me to share my feelings on "Women's Rights", "Feminism" and "The March".

Let's be honest for a second, it is literally the difference between men and women that facilitates the procreation of human life. It takes a man and a woman to create a new life. Seriously. It takes a sperm and an egg. Without either, there is not life. Neither the egg nor the sperm is more important, but both working together, in perfect union, create a new life. 

I have several friends who argue that the woman then does "all the work" thus making her more "valuable" than the man, and while humor can be found in the discrepancy of the physical contribution after conception, that does not make the man's contribution any less valuable. The woman would not be able to carry and nourish that life without the man doing his part. (Even if that part was "just" donating the sperm.)

I am all for bettering the treatment of women around the world, but honestly, I am really for treating everyone with dignity and respect and improving the quality of life for everyone.

I believe that around the globe, women face many forms of abuse and injustice and I believe that we, as humans (not just women), are obligated to help our sisters. 

However, I do not believe that it needs to include tearing men down, devaluing them or trying to assert our gender as superior. I have a surprising number of friends who have crossed over from equality to reverse discrimination. They want women to be seen as "better than" men. It is sad that a good cause is being lost in the drive for superiority.

I also believe that we can't just "talk about it" and "share our opinions" or even just "march" and expect things to change. We need to also get out there and make a tangible difference. 

We can donate time and resources to organizations that help free women from sex trafficking, and while we are at it, let's help free children of both genders from that as well. We can help women who are victims of abuse, and while we are at it we can help children of both genders and stop belittling the experiences of men who have been victims of abuse and help them as well. We can make a positive difference for women around the world while also making a positive difference for men.

I really believe that we can make the greatest difference when we work together, in love, to improve conditions for all humanity.

Equality, true equality, is placing the same amount of value upon each life, not removing the differences that make each one of us special. That begins in the womb, before gender is known, and it continues even into how we speak of others posthumously. If we want to see equality for a specific group of people, we have to respect and value every life.

I believe that positive change can be made, but not by trying to bury the differences that make us unique or by trying to elevate one group while bringing another down. We cannot protect or gain our own rights while taking away the rights of others, including the unborn and men.

A wise man said...

The real difference will come when we love equally. When we help equally. When we are compassionate and passionate about bettering every life, not just our own or those "like" us. <3

Bless and be blessed, y'all.