Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Sexuality...

It is the one area in which most of us struggle, yet it is the topic that is the most shied away from in the church.

Why do we cringe inwardly and get nervous when the word "sex", or for that matter anything to do with sex, is brought up in church?

It is foolishness to dismiss a topic of such importance. So many people struggle in the area of sexuality. There is pain, confusion, and so much misinformation, leaving the vast majority of us lost and hurting feeling isolated and hopeless in our struggle.

Y'all, it doesn't have to be that way!

The subject of sexuality isn'the something to be hidden or afraid of, it is the very core of who God designed us to be. 

"He created them male and female and blessed them..." - Genesis 5:2 He designed and created us to fit together perfectly, in sexual unity. 

In His design, there was NO shame "Now the man and his wife were both naked, but they felt no shame." - Genesis 2:25

Sexuality is also a lot more than just having intercourse. It is our identity, how we see ourselves. It is our body image. It effects how we present ourselves. It plays a large part in how we talk to and relate with others.

I am leading a women's group called "Restoring Sexuality". It isn't a counseling session, group therapy, how-to or what not-to typeople of thing. It is a safe place to come together, open up, share our struggles, uncover our beliefs about sexuality and ourselves, to replace the lies we have embraced with the truth of God's heart for us and His design for our sexuality.

Would you be suprised to know that His plan was for us to be shamelessly free and whole in our sexuality? 

If that doesn't feel true to you and where you are at, I really want to encourage you that it can and should be.

On Sunday, I faced two fears, public speaking and judgment, to get up, not once but twice, and share this with the whole church. 

The first day of our group, we write down the word "Sexuality" and what that means to us. What feelings, emotions, words, definitions the word brings to mind. It is the first step in revealing our beliefs about sexuality. 

The first time I did that this was my list:

- Judgment 
- Insecurity 
- Expectations (that I could never meet)
- Closeness (making me open to getting hurt)
- Vulnerability  (the kind that leads to pain and betrayal)
- Identity (as in a very negative identity of unattractiveness, inequity, and being garbage)

When we talked about it last week at our first meet up this was my list:

- Intimacy 
- Closeness (being in unity with someone else)
- Freedom (to be genuinely myself)
- Confidence
- Designed (to be good)
- Vulnerability  (being able to be open, honest, and transparent)
- Identity  (as God's creation)

See when we take the step to trust God, to open up and be vulnerable with God and people we can trust, we are able to dispell the lies, discover the truth, be healed and set free.

God wants us to be whole. To be restored to His perfect design for us.

If you need someone to talk to, I would be happy to be here for you. ^_^

It is my prayer for you all that you would be healed, renewed, restored and set free in your sexuality.

It is my hope that the church will become more open, honest and a genuinely safe place to discuss sexuality transparently. 

If you are interested in our Restoring Sexuality group for women, please contact me on Facebook at facebook.com/kate.conder or via email at blesswitheachbreath@gmail.com

We also have a group for men. You can reach out to my husband, Steve, on Facebook at facebook.com/steve.conder.35




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