God's Plan or My Will?

As I have been studying the story of Sampson, in the book of Judges in the Bible, I have found myself wondering...

How many times have I robbed myself of the fullness of God's incredible plan for me because I sought first my own selfish desires?

If I am being honest, there are times when I am not unlike a stubborn child, wanting what I want when I want it. Completely unwilling to relent or even wait. Flat out refusing to take "no" for an answer. In those moments, when I was asserting my independence and declaring the sovereignty of my own will and plans, what amazing things was I rejecting without even an inkling as to what they might be... What have I stubbornly chosen to miss out on?

As a mom, there have been so many times when my children have asked for something and I have told them "no" or "not now" because I knew that something better was in their future or that the timing was not quite right for them to be able to fully appreciate it.

When the kids were little, I'm talking toddler little, those exchanges would be accompanied by some form of pleading, pouting and possibly crying from the child. As they got older, their reactions transitioned from anger and world-crushing-devastation, to disappointment and pouting, and now that they are older they will often respond with acceptance. 

They have learned something along the way. They have learned that sometimes what they want in the moment isn't what they truly want. They know that waiting won't kill them. In fact, they have learned that when the right time comes they will be really excited when they finally get it, or they may no longer even want it because they have discovered something better. 

I wonder how many times God has been trying to give me something better or do something amazing in my life but, driven by my internal focus and the emotions I was feeling at the moment, I rejected what He was offering.

Even as an adult, it can be hard to let go of what I want. Sometimes, I feel like I am losing something or like I will be missing out on something. There are times when I even feel a fair amount of fear in letting go. It can be hard to see past the things I want, the things I think I need, or my great plans, in order to be able to submit to God's will and embrace the unknown until the time when I can finally clearly see the awesome plan that God has for me.

All I know is, that I don't want to do what Sampson did. 

I don't want to choose my, often disappointing, plans instead of God's incredible design for my life. I don't want the most powerful part of my testimony to be my death. I want my life to be the testimony of how one girl continued to choose to put her faith, her trust and her hope in God's hands, no matter how crazy, scary or foolish it seemed. I want to live out the fullness of my purpose according to His plan. I want to live for Him with reckless abandon and love greatly, just as He loves me. 

I want to set my will and my plans aside.

I want to embrace God's plan.

I want to surrender to His will.

I want to take the leaps of faith. 

I want to live the life I was created for.

I want to experience all that God has for me.

I don't want to waste time and I don't want regrets. I want to choose His plan. <3

"God's plans will always be greater and more beautiful than all your disappointments."

Be blessed, my friends.